ZThemes

The official blog for the Commander of the LEP: Trouble Kelp. Also the official blog for the fiance of Captain Holly Short, and the father of Indigo Coral Short-Kelp and Jasper Newton Short-Kelp
Can we all agree that Holly looks flipping beautiful when she’s leading a training session for cadets? Nobody loves her job like she does, seriously.
TK

Can we all agree that Holly looks flipping beautiful when she’s leading a training session for cadets? Nobody loves her job like she does, seriously.

TK

posted Apr.06.14 + 6 notes + reblog
wingcommander-valedecem:
Me, Butler and Holly

dearhollyshort:

ixamxleigh:

UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH REALLY????

Shag: Butler

Marry: You

Get Drunk With: Holly (do fairies have alcohol?…)

To answer your question: we have our own version of alcohol that is much less damaging to the system than your rubbish. Trust me I’m the best to get drunk with. Wrk hard and play hard after all! H x

I can vouch for that….As can the existence of our two children… And before Holly groin kicks me: yes i am eternally glad that we got monumentally trashed those two times and ended up with Goo and Jazz. TK

foutre:

dearhollyshort:

d-butler:

70s-postmiserablism:

there’s fucking opal koboi/opal koboi fic

but no butler/holly

i think about this a lot

what

Double what

Triple what

Quadruple what

(Source: 70s--postmiserablism)

Last night reminded me of the most important moral in life: Never ever drink with Trouble Kelp.

dearhollyshort:

The People may not drink alcohol but our equivalent is equally lethal, especially when paired with an early-rising infant…

H x

Unfair. You’re the one who made it a competition, dear wife!

-TK

posted Feb.20.14 + 5 notes + reblog
artemisfowlfiles:
Thank you for your cooperation. You can pass along to Foaly that I will need access to the LEP's nominal databases of known criminals with ties to the surface, DNA profiles, the illegal firearms and chemical substances trafficking log, whatever your equivalent of Interpol's Fusion Task Force database is to track foreign and domestic terrorists, the stolen administrative and travel documents database, and any file that references me. -Artemis

Your welcome.

I’ve passed that along, and Foaly says that’s all fine- when would be a good time for you to come down here?

TK

posted Dec.17.13 + 3 notes + reblog
Gooey has a dance exam today and so I’ve taken the other Short-Kelp into work with me while Holly goes to the scary world known as the dance hall.. Looks like I’ll be staying firmly stuck to this desk for the day, then! Good thing Jasper is in such a sunny mood today!
We’ll see what he’s looking like after a day spent watching his Da sift through LEP protocol…
TK

Gooey has a dance exam today and so I’ve taken the other Short-Kelp into work with me while Holly goes to the scary world known as the dance hall.. Looks like I’ll be staying firmly stuck to this desk for the day, then! Good thing Jasper is in such a sunny mood today!

We’ll see what he’s looking like after a day spent watching his Da sift through LEP protocol…

TK

posted Dec.16.13 + 2 notes + reblog
artemisfowlfiles:
Commander, I'm certain you've been well-informed of my current situation. If there is any possibility of you and Foaly allowing me to come below ground to access some files on the LEP's server, I would be appreciative. I am also well aware of your potential hesitancy, so as an additional security measure I would be willing to sit beside Foaly and direct him to the information about which I am most curious.

artemisfowlfiles:

commandertroublekelp:

commandertroublekelp:

Ah, hello there Artemis- I was actually just having a long conversation with my wife about you. Nothing to worry about, honest. She’s just getting a little worried about you, but I think I’ve convinced her not to fly up top right this second.

Now, about these files. It’s not a question of hesitancy, particularly- I have long since stopped having doubts about you and your trustworthiness. It’s more that there are very strict laws about civilians accessing LEP documents, regardless of who they are. Holly can’t even access the server during maternity leave because technically she counts as a civilian during that period. What I’m going to do, though, is have a sift through some loopholes and find a backdoor for you- I know there’s one somewhere. Whatever happens, it will definitely be done via Foaly with you sitting next to him, or at least under the supervision of Foaly.

I would ask, though, that you remain patient through this process- I know it’s your father and you’re anxious to get to the bottom of his murder, but finding your own way into the server won’t get things going any faster, okay Artemis? I’m sticking my neck out for you here, so would appreciate as much cooperation as possible. 

TK

Unfortunately you being settled doesn’t mean the same for Holly. 

I know that in the past you have violated laws but, with respect, this isn’t a time of crisis for the People. At least not yet….As I said, I will do my best but I have a duty to keep to the law.

Working as fast as I can, Artemis. Hang tight.

TK

With respect, if you are not willing to take steps as if you’re in crisis until you’ve observed you’re in crisis— you’re already at least two steps behind.

If my father was poisoned by the People, or rogue contingent of the People acting with or without human aid, then it is quite likely there is some act planned against Haven.

image

If I’m going to break rules as if I’m in crisis every time there’s a small chance of a crisis then I might as well have no rules at all. Plenty of fairies have it in for you, Artemis, without having any issues with Haven. I believe Holly has a whole file on planned assassinations she’s foiled over the years.

But before this conversation gets out of hand and turns into arguing over LEP logistics, I’m happy to say I’ve found a way in. I won’t go into the details but, basically, if anybody asks you’re helping Foaly upgrade the system. All I need from you is a list of the areas you’re needing to have a look at- it doesn’t have to be fully comprehensive, I understand that a certain amount of just poking around might be needed but just general areas would be helpful. Mainly to get a break from a certain centaur’s moaning….

TK

posted Dec.16.13 + 7 notes + reblog
artemisfowlfiles:
Commander, I'm certain you've been well-informed of my current situation. If there is any possibility of you and Foaly allowing me to come below ground to access some files on the LEP's server, I would be appreciative. I am also well aware of your potential hesitancy, so as an additional security measure I would be willing to sit beside Foaly and direct him to the information about which I am most curious.

artemisfowlfiles:

commandertroublekelp:

Ah, hello there Artemis- I was actually just having a long conversation with my wife about you. Nothing to worry about, honest. She’s just getting a little worried about you, but I think I’ve convinced her not to fly up top right this second.

Now, about these files. It’s not a question of hesitancy, particularly- I have long since stopped having doubts about you and your trustworthiness. It’s more that there are very strict laws about civilians accessing LEP documents, regardless of who they are. Holly can’t even access the server during maternity leave because technically she counts as a civilian during that period. What I’m going to do, though, is have a sift through some loopholes and find a backdoor for you- I know there’s one somewhere. Whatever happens, it will definitely be done via Foaly with you sitting next to him, or at least under the supervision of Foaly.

I would ask, though, that you remain patient through this process- I know it’s your father and you’re anxious to get to the bottom of his murder, but finding your own way into the server won’t get things going any faster, okay Artemis? I’m sticking my neck out for you here, so would appreciate as much cooperation as possible. 

TK

I’m sure she is worried, but as of this moment I feel relatively settled with my decision and chosen path concerning this issue. 

Ah, strict laws. I venture to say the any one of us have violated at least a dozen of the LEP’s protocols or the People’s laws in times of crisis. I do understand that there are complications, but I remember Commander Root deputizing Mulch on at least one occasion. I am certain a solution will be found with relative speed.

I am prepared to cooperate, but I do need to stress that, for me at least, time is of the essence. 

image

Unfortunately you being settled doesn’t mean the same for Holly.

I know that in the past you have violated laws but, with respect, this isn’t a time of crisis for the People. At least not yet….As I said, I will do my best but I have a duty to keep to the law.

Working as fast as I can, Artemis. Hang tight.

TK

posted Dec.16.13 + 7 notes + reblog
artemisfowlfiles:
Commander, I'm certain you've been well-informed of my current situation. If there is any possibility of you and Foaly allowing me to come below ground to access some files on the LEP's server, I would be appreciative. I am also well aware of your potential hesitancy, so as an additional security measure I would be willing to sit beside Foaly and direct him to the information about which I am most curious.

Ah, hello there Artemis- I was actually just having a long conversation with my wife about you. Nothing to worry about, honest. She’s just getting a little worried about you, but I think I’ve convinced her not to fly up top right this second.

Now, about these files. It’s not a question of hesitancy, particularly- I have long since stopped having doubts about you and your trustworthiness. It’s more that there are very strict laws about civilians accessing LEP documents, regardless of who they are. Holly can’t even access the server during maternity leave because technically she counts as a civilian during that period. What I’m going to do, though, is have a sift through some loopholes and find a backdoor for you- I know there’s one somewhere. Whatever happens, it will definitely be done via Foaly with you sitting next to him, or at least under the supervision of Foaly.

I would ask, though, that you remain patient through this process- I know it’s your father and you’re anxious to get to the bottom of his murder, but finding your own way into the server won’t get things going any faster, okay Artemis? I’m sticking my neck out for you here, so would appreciate as much cooperation as possible. 

TK

posted Dec.15.13 + 7 notes + reblog
dearhollyshort:

This is apparently what baby boy is going to look like when he finally pops out from down below! Obviously that’s going by human standards of genetic mixing…but still fun to see! 
For the record: Trubs’ idea. No matter what he says!
H x

Yeah, sure Holly- all my idea ;) I liking the fact that our ‘prospective son’ is wearing hairclips, what a star. TK

dearhollyshort:

This is apparently what baby boy is going to look like when he finally pops out from down below! Obviously that’s going by human standards of genetic mixing…but still fun to see! 

For the record: Trubs’ idea. No matter what he says!

H x

Yeah, sure Holly- all my idea ;) I liking the fact that our ‘prospective son’ is wearing hairclips, what a star. TK

posted Aug.27.13 + 2 notes + reblog